We all want to be liked. Even the roughest among us has an innate need to be liked, or at least not disliked. That's what makes being a writer so difficult at times - we have to put our work out there for others to read and critique, and not everyone will fall down singing hosannas of praise to our work. Some, in fact, will be quite mean about what they say. This is simply a part of the business of writing.
I've sold only a few books. Most of those reviewing my work have been complimentary, but not everybody. I won't go into the critiques themselves because it's not a great thing for business to try and refute those who are nasty to you and your work. Some people are nasty just to be nasty. Some people just won't like what you wrote. It's hard to determine either way sometimes, and it doesn't matter. Everyone's got an opinion, and you won't care for all of them.
Part of getting over the bruise to your ego is looking at the critiques that were less than flattering and seeing if there is substance to them. As noted above, some people live to tear down others, but some give good feedback, even if they didn't like your work. I'd say to treat them the way you would treat beta-readers - do they have a point, and is there a trend? If either exists, try to incorporate it into your next book so you can get better. Shouldn't that be something we all want?
And while I've often said that we shouldn't get too caught up in those who praise us, no matter how good it feels, don't just shrug that part off either. Many critiques by folks who liked your stuff will give you nuggets to move forward with. Yes, we need to fix the bad, but we also need to know what's good so we can continue to do what worked, and how will we know what worked if we aren't told? Anonymous critiques, or critiques by those who don't know you, are often the best because you know you're getting the unvarnished truth about how they feel. Sure, your family and best friend may be giving you honest feedback, but let's face it - they (probably) love you and don't want to hurt your feelings, so they'll emphasize the good and downplay the bad. Great stuff, but not the most productive if you want to get better.
It's hard to toss aside your ego, but try. The more you wade into criticism, the thicker skin you'll grow(assuming you aren't biting back). That thick skin is a necessary part of being a writer since not only is it near impossible to escape criticism, but acceptance of it can only make you stronger.
I've sold only a few books. Most of those reviewing my work have been complimentary, but not everybody. I won't go into the critiques themselves because it's not a great thing for business to try and refute those who are nasty to you and your work. Some people are nasty just to be nasty. Some people just won't like what you wrote. It's hard to determine either way sometimes, and it doesn't matter. Everyone's got an opinion, and you won't care for all of them.
Part of getting over the bruise to your ego is looking at the critiques that were less than flattering and seeing if there is substance to them. As noted above, some people live to tear down others, but some give good feedback, even if they didn't like your work. I'd say to treat them the way you would treat beta-readers - do they have a point, and is there a trend? If either exists, try to incorporate it into your next book so you can get better. Shouldn't that be something we all want?
And while I've often said that we shouldn't get too caught up in those who praise us, no matter how good it feels, don't just shrug that part off either. Many critiques by folks who liked your stuff will give you nuggets to move forward with. Yes, we need to fix the bad, but we also need to know what's good so we can continue to do what worked, and how will we know what worked if we aren't told? Anonymous critiques, or critiques by those who don't know you, are often the best because you know you're getting the unvarnished truth about how they feel. Sure, your family and best friend may be giving you honest feedback, but let's face it - they (probably) love you and don't want to hurt your feelings, so they'll emphasize the good and downplay the bad. Great stuff, but not the most productive if you want to get better.
It's hard to toss aside your ego, but try. The more you wade into criticism, the thicker skin you'll grow(assuming you aren't biting back). That thick skin is a necessary part of being a writer since not only is it near impossible to escape criticism, but acceptance of it can only make you stronger.
No comments:
Post a Comment