Sunday, December 3, 2017

Page Critiques...By Agents?

Being signed up for several writing websites, I often get semi-spam emails from them(I guess they're not actually spam since I did sign up for updates, no matter how trivial).  Many of them are invitations to writers' conferences, while others give "tips" on how to write better or appeal to an audience.  I look at some and disregard others, as I'm sure we all do.  However, the ones that make me chortle the most are the ones about how I can submit a few pages of my work to an OMG ACTUAL LITERARY AGENT and get their valued advice.

My disdain for literary agents is no secret.  I put most ion the same category I do the folks who are writing books telling you they can make you rich - if they really knew the secret, shouldn't they be following their own advice rather than telling others how to do it?  Most agents I've come across are little more than famous-author-wannabes who had little to no success as writers, so they decided to join the cool-kids club by sucking up to publishers.

Agents pass off the solicitation for ten page critiques by implying they know all about what makes a great book because they have inside knowledge of what publishers are looking for.  Of course a few folks showed this to be a bunch of hokum, most notably the guy who resubmitted an award winning book to see how agents and publishers would react, only to be rejected more than three dozen times(including by the publishing house that put out the original).

If I want a real critique, I want it from a publisher, not an agent.  Further, I'd like it from several different publishers(or at least several different people at the same house).  After all, aren't these the folks who decide what gets published?  Agents don't do that - they try to get publishers to accept a book, but they don't publish themselves.  So why would I care about their opinion?

Getting published by a traditional publisher is hit or miss to begin with.  Therefore, why introduce a middleman who may or may not have any additional insight beyond knowing what he or she likes to read?  These are the same people who told Dr. Seuss that his stuff was too different from most of what's out there for juveniles, so they couldn't accept his work.

If you're looking for page critiques, you have two other routes that make much more sense.  The first, in keeping with the theme here, is to try and find someone who actually works for a publishing house and is willing to look at your stuff.  At least at that point you're dealing with someone who has made decisions regarding real publishing, not just the hope of publishing.  The second is to get them critiqued by your target demographic and see if your audience thinks you have any talent.  Either way, don't go to an agent who doesn't get to make the decision on what gets published, but rather just may get to pass your book along, where it may or may not be seen, much less accepted.

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