I think all of us want to come across as confident. After all, confidence draws people to us. In survey after survey, women say that confidence is the biggest component to being attracted to a man. In business, we’re all drawn towards the confident(but not arrogant) leader who seems to have all the answers.
Therefore it can be intimidating to us when we look inside and know that we don’t have the same level of confidence that those we look up to have. What’s wrong with me? we wonder. Everyone else seems to have it all together.
The largest place this comes into play with us is in regards to our writing. What if people don’t like my stories? What if someone says that I’m, no good? Geez, that last thing I wrote doesn’t seem quite right? Maybe no one will buy my books and I’ll have to go back to my window washing job.
We all have doubts about this writing thing. And you know what? That’s okay. It’s natural to have doubts, for we’re engaging in an uncertain enterprise. This is not some union-secured job where we know that unless we screw up in a major way, we’re going to get paid. Our success depends on others liking and buying our books. If the audience decides that we’re not interesting enough, then we don’t get paid and no one likes us.
This can be enough to cripple even the most prolific writer. Some of us go to writing conferences or engage with other writers on blogs, and our fellow writers seem to have it all together. Well, I’ll let you in on a little secret – they all have the same doubts you do.
Doubting, in and of itself, isn’t a bad thing. The key is to turn that doubt into motivation to work hard and make yourself a success. Get out there and promote your work. Do research on what audience will best enjoy your writing. Get engaged with writing forums and learn the craft even better.
And, of course, do it all with confidence.
What does that mean, especially when we’ve just discussed that we have doubts? It means to fake it till you make it. Act with confidence, even if you have none. I get it – that’s hard. Doubt seeps into your soul like mold, spreading through your spirit until it feels like it’s everywhere. Who cares? Unless you express it, no one can tell, so long as you act confident.
I’ve known some great writers who have egos of crystal. The slightest thing can crush their confidence, but you’d never know it. If you need to find a friend to confide in so you can release your emotions, do it, but then put on your happy face and show the world that you know what you’re doing. It’s not easy, but it will inspire true confidence once you’ve made it. And you will make it – never doubt that, for if you let those doubts stop you, then all the naysayers were right. It’s okay to have doubts(everyone does), but it’s not okay to let them stop you.